I STILL LOVE U!! Courageously pursue your passion

Artists don't get down to working until the pain of working is exceeded by the pain of not working

"Regardless of the form it takes, embracing creative passion offers you the opportunity to live authentically as you increasingly accept your uniquely evolving individual identity. If offers you the opportunity to connect with yourself by truly identifying what you feel and believe about the world as your role in it. At the same time, pursuing your creative passion is almost always accompanied by challenge, the confrontation of forces within you that resist and undermine authentic being."

I am in the fashion design industry and have been for the past 6 years. What a journey it has been. I started my own little business creating custom formal dresses with fierce passion right after I graduated from design school in 2004.

The past year or so I have grown so much yet felt like I havent been actively pursuing my passion and even questioned if it even aligns with who i am now. I felt like I put so much pressure on myself to get somewhere that I felt like I wasn't doing this for myself anymore. After expressing this out loud and after letting go of all the expectations I had surrounded myself with, I started to feel lighter and I now feel my passion is growing even stronger than before. I think I just needed to find my courage again after facing plenty of personal discouragements and inner conflicts I had with myself.

When you pursues a creative career you come across a lot of fear. You feel naked, vulnerable and exposed when you put yourself out there. When you dont get the results you expected you feel inadequate about your abilities & accomplishments. You're presented with so may self doubts that sometimes it becomes paralyzing. There's so much that comes with pursuing your passion...so much discomfort, anxiety, fear, disappointment, frustrations, guilt, shame...

Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakes

"Regardless of the unique issues that contribute to inhibit any individual's capacity to embrace creative passion, fear and anxiety are inherent in the creative process itself. Descending into the unknown, feeling vulnerable to the reaction of others, the tension you experience as you commit to temporarily suspend critical judgment; these factors interact in such a way as to threaten your progress and full engagement in the creative moment."

At this point some ppl find it too uncomfortable to move on. Their sense of identity is directly related to what they produce. If they create something favorable they feel good but when they don't they arouse anxiety and start being critical of themselves.

I've been there. I've been where the negativity gets overwhelming and it can literally put out the fire. But its something I needed to go thru to understand myself better and practice resiliency to move forward. There's a lot of patience and practice that one needs to cultivate to be really good at something. The greatest artists, athletes, writers and musicians didnt simply get to where they are just from wishing so. They got there bcos they kept going, practiced, learned and nurtured their skills no matter how painful it gets sometimes.

♥ KNOW YOURSELF. Know what time of day you have the most energy to maximize your productivity. Know when you can keep pushing yourself and when to sit back and give yourself a break.

♥ TRUST YOURSELF. Open up to life and have faith that the decisions you make will get you to where you need to go. Confidence in your abilities goes hand in hand with trusting yourself.

♥ CULTIVATE COURAGE. It requires boldness and a fearless attitude to express yourself. Courage allows you to keep going when you feel discouragement and it pushes you to move forward. Courage helps you take the risk to put your creativity out there.

♥ REMEMBER YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS. We tend to focus on what we did wrong or could have done better. This isn't necessarily a bad thing bcos it helps us see where we can make adjustments or improvements but if you linger here it can cripple you. So dont forget to acknowledge the things you have done to have gotten you to where you are now.

Earth Day. Go hug a tree

SAVE THE WHALES. k bad shot cos my hair is in the way

I dont really know where to start. I've been an animal lover and a tree hugger ever since I can remember. This topic is very close to my heart and I cant begin to think of the words to express the empathy I feel. I try to do as much as I can on a daily basis but sometimes I need days like today to re-connect my heart with one of things i truly care about.

I watched Oprah today and wanted to share this with you guys Save the Dolphins. Dolphins have the same consciousness as us humans, meaning that they are self aware and have the ability to remember the past and the future while remaining aware of the present. It really hit a soft spot when Ric O'Barry was telling up a story of how Flipper was depressed and ended up killing himself.

There is so much going out there in this world that effects the Earth. I can't possibly cover it all but I did want to share that one story with you guys today. To the world you may only be one person, but to one person you could mean the world. Pls take action. Donate or sign the petition.

The Essence of a Dress. Meet Maia

meow meow. This is the first entry for my ESSENCE OF A DRESS series. Being a creative person I've come to realize how important the progress of a project is. So I want to take you along with me...to see how I breathe life into the dresses that I create. The ideas, inspirations, sweat, tears and sometimes blood(all the needle pokes grr) that goes into the making of a dress gives it it's essence. That's why I decided to name my dresses.

So with that being said...pls meet Maia. Maia is the Greek Goddess of Spring. When I think Spring I think of blossoms. I think of fresh air, fresh starts and unexpected endings.

This is the inspiration board of images I culled to give myself a better idea of what I wanted to create. Inspiration can come in many different forms. It can come from the lyrics of a song, the smell of french perfume, from nature, architecture, people...anything and everything.

♥ My Creation ♥

I wanted to create Maia for a wedding I was attending so I was first inspired by how I felt. I felt light, happy and slightly dreamy so from that I projected it externally into something more tangible. I chose soft milky colors for Maia...lilac, pink and white. And since Maia is a Goddess I designed something that had an empire waist. For a feminine touch I created the neckline to resemble the delicate curve of a flower petal to follow the curve of a woman's breast.

Spring represents fresh changes and new perspectives but in order for something new to begin we almost always need to leave something behind. I wanted to incorporate this belief into the back design of the dress. I think this detail is very unexpected but it gives a bit of playfulness to Maia's character. Vertical lines also create length as well as feminine curves.

2 cents a wish

I used to wish for wishes like getting an awesome job, to lose weight, to move to a different city...etc but now I realize that those aren't wishes as much as they are goals. I would write a list of wishes in each area of my life (lifestyle, relationships, family, career, health, career...) and a year or 2 later id stumble upon them and realized that those wishes had come true. well most of them anyways. lol* or to a certain extent. i guess what im trying to say is that we can usually make most of our wishes come true simply by acting upon them.

I remember I used to have an unending list of wishes but I've noticed that it has gotten shorter each year. I look around me and can't help but feel gratitude for the things i already have. Regardless, I still do have a wish list.

The easier stuff
I wish...

...to find thigh high boots that fit perfectly. They always seem to bunch or sag by the ankles or behind the knee
...to melt away the last little bit of baby fat I still have
...i could blog more often
...to respect my body more and not fill it with unhealthy substances
...complain less
...be less judgmental

the not-so-easy stuff
i wish...

...look upon a sky filled with stars every night
...to live in a house on a beach so i can hear the waves every night before i fall asleep
...to live in NYC for a little white
...to have my own boutique where i can sell my designs along side others
...see the world. Next desired stops would be Paris, Milan, Japan, Australia
...be more consistent in my moods
...going on a shopping spree
...i had a glowing, flawless complexion without the use of makeup
...to be in a music video
...to finished re-decorating my room. need $ for that =(
...i had more energy
...learn to love ppl unconditionally
...to get rid of my debt

the hard hard stuff
i wish...

...to have a plentiful, abundant bank account that would never be depleted
...to have a pet unicorn
...to eat anything and as much as i want without unhealthy effects
...to be 3 inches taller
...to be rid of all my resentment
...to see my mom again
...it was summer. grr it snowed last night
...to have ppl stop mistreating the earth
...to save all the animals in the world
..to turn into a black panther for a day

What do you wish for?